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Understanding Your Asexual Friend

According to Healthline, “Someone who’s asexual experiences little to no sexual attraction.
Sexual attraction is about finding a specific person sexually appealing and wanting to have sex with them.” 

Asexual experiences are as varied as the individuals themselves. However, one thing in common is the little to no sexual attraction. 

We spoke to Kaira (name changed), an asexual person, to bust some myths around asexuality:

1) Asexuals can’t be in relationships

This is not true because asexuality is about sexual attraction. Although asexuals can experience romantic attraction, and many want a romantic relationship, this depends on whether they identify as romantic or aromantic asexuals. 

2) Asexuals hate sex

Not all asexuals hate sex; some are neutral, and some are sex-positive. The latter may engage in sex with their allosexual partners (everyone who isn’t asexual) 

3) Asexuals can only date asexuals

This is not true. They can date anyone on the sexual spectrum as long as both parties are clear on their needs, wants, and ability to compromise.

4) Asexuals don’t masturbate

A lot of asexuals may masturbate; this once again varies depending on the person. Some do, some don’t.

5) Asexuals never watch pornography

Some asexuals enjoy self-pleasure, quite a few may not watch pornography, but this again varies from ace to ace.

Asexuality is a broad spectrum, although there is no official classification, here are some common types of asexuals:

1) Gray Asexual

In this case, there is some sexual desire, although with very low intensity.

2) Demisexual

Here, they feel sexual attraction with people to which you have previously come to feel a strong romantic interest or emotional attachment. 

3) Lithosexual

Here, the person feels sexual attraction but has no desire to reciprocate or be on the receiving end of sexual activity.

4) Apothisexual

Here, the person is repulsed by the thought of sex.

5) Fraysexual

Here, the person feels sexual attraction towards strangers, but it disappears once they get to know them.

6) Cupiosexual

Here, the person wants a sexual relationship but does not experience sexual attraction.

7) Abrosexual

Here, the person’s orientation fluctuates between different orientations.

8) Aegeosexual/ Autochorisexual

Here, the person experiences disconnection between themselves and the target of sexual arousal.

9) Aromantic asexuals

In addition to not feeling sexual desire, these are people who do not experience romantic love for other people.

10) Romantic asexuals

In this case, they don’t experience sexual attraction but experience romantic attraction. In this case, they can experience attraction towards any person of any gender orientation and may identify as homoromantic, biromantic, heteroromantic, etc.

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